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[kickem]

Ray. Leave a message.

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[kickem]

[Don't mind Ray, just sat on the bed, considering wrestling into a fresh set of clothing or whether a shower is probably a good idea. Pulling all nighters should really be followed by a good shower and a change of clothing.

Still distracted by the curious puppy face stealing robot though.]

Uh?

[Glancing at his shoulder as if he's forgotten what's there.]

A tattoo. [Mr. Obvious.]

[hairlocked]

[ Just sat there being curiously touched by strangers. Creepy weird robot strangers.

Poke poke. ]

I can see that. But it's not very... [ Leoben glances up and grins. ] What does it mean?

[ Eager cheerful happy robot face. Please explain it to him? ]

[kickem]

[Surprisingly accepting of the poking, perhaps if only because he's still contemplating whether smashing this guys teeth in would be worth it or not. Probably not. Also not a great idea to assault guys in your own home, especially not when you're a cop.

Plus it's hard to punch such an eager and happy face, especially when it's his own face looking back at him. God, it's even weirder close up.]

Champion. Y'know like the uh, the sparkplugs? Dad was always about Champions. I guess it seemed like a cool idea when I was a teen.

[hairlocked]

I've heard of it. I didn't imagine I'd ever see this body of ours permanently inked.

[ Maybe it is weird, but Leoben hovers only for a moment longer before giving Ray back his space, sweeping across the room to look in Ray's closet. It's...eclectic; he'd thought so before, but this time he takes out Ray's Razorbacks shirt, and glances over his shoulder. ]

You don't have women up here often, do you?

[ Such a judgey robot. ]

[kickem]

[Ray keeps his eyes on the other, brows furrowing as the closet is approached.]

What's it to you? So what?

[Always on the defensive.]

[hairlocked]

Well it's...very masculine. And dirty.

[ He comes away from the closet slowly, this time approaching Ray straight. He tilts his head slightly to one side, stopping several feet in front of him.

Then it's a very careful, measuring look that Ray gets, dark, immensely focused eyes, unblinking. Leoben gestures with both hands. ]

Up.

[kickem]

Hey, I clean! ... Sometimes.

[Except pretty much never because Ray's barely ever at home anyway. But he doesn't argue the point much further because Leoben's approaching and there's something in that look.

There's the temptation to refuse, but Ray needs to get up if he ever wishes to actually continue not sitting around mostly naked. And so he does get up, but not before dragging his holster right beside him and making sure the weapon is in easy reach.]

[hairlocked]

You aren't going to shoot me in here. This is your home.

[ But he steps forward despite the open threat, reaching his hands to Ray's shoulders and patting them, then bringing his hands down to his elbows, tilting them up, forcing him to correct his posture. ]

Put some energy into it, some confidence. You can smoulder. [ He narrowed his eyes right back. ] Stand up straight.

[kickem]

[He's tensing up the moment he sees hands moving towards him, and doesn't relax even as the touching comes. Not at all comfortable with this right now, thank you very much.]

Hands off, asshole.

[On the plus side, his defence is to try and go alpha, straightening up anyway and chest puffing out. Stand tall, show 'em who's boss.]

[hairlocked]

Yeah. Yes, that's more like it.

[ Because Leoben is right there waiting for him when he straightens up, and they're eye to eye, and he breaks into a slow, confident smile, and lifts both his hands back up into the air in mock surrender. ]

I knew you could do it. Hands off, see?

[ And yet. And yet he leans in and pecks Ray's lips in a kiss, and then ducks back, putting his dukes up defensively, daring him with a quirk of his eyebrows. ]

So why did she leave you?

[kickem]

[Oh, the hands off was great. It's just a shame it had to be ruined by lips that have Ray jerking his head back defensively. Ew, gross, kisses. At least it's from a good looking guy...

He'd complain about it but then there's that question and Ray's not even thinking, doesn't even notice his fist suddenly hurtling towards Leoben's face.]

Fuck you!

[hairlocked]

[ Leoben is quick - very quick - and that means quick enough that he can see Ray coming and deliberately lower his defense, dropping his hands down from where he's protecting his face and letting him catch him hard across the jaw.

And down he goes, wham, staggering sidewards and catching himself on the closet door. Split lip, his blood up, that dangerous flicker of light in his eyes. He thrives on the violence in some ways. It means he touched a nerve, and he's died enough times to know. ]

I knew all that muscle wasn't just for show.

[kickem]

[Ray can't help but think Leoben practically walked into that punch. He's done enough boxing to spot when defences are lowered and that very much looked like the case. Freak.]

You don't get to talk about her.

[Trying to be somewhat intimidating while standing there in his underwear. So scurey.]

[hairlocked]

Or go near her. I know the deal.

[ He is very intimidating. Spry and young and human. Leoben admires him from the floor, admires all the power in that punch, nurses his jaw gently with his left hand, and then reaches it out toward Ray in the universal gesture of 'you hit me now you get to help me up, please?' ]

I wanted to know how much. Now I know.

[ How much what? ]

[kickem]

[Exactly the question Ray's wondering.]

How much what...?

[This guy makes basically no sense ever. But at least Ray's gentlemanly enough to grasp for that offered hand and tug with his body weight to try and get Leo back on his feet.]

[hairlocked]

[ He holds tight and pushes upward with his body weight, wrapping him up in another rough hug once he's on his feet and scratching his own stubble against Ray's as he answers right into his ear. ]

How much you love her. Hitting's the best way to find out. I used to care about someone like that. [ The briefest flicker of consideration. ] She died.

[kickem]

[Ugh, enough with the hugging, especially when Ray has got so much skin exposed. Just going to try and pry Leoben off.]

Yeah, well, I guess it's hard to find chicks that'll like to 150k these days, huh?

[hairlocked]

[ He lets himself be pried away, and then goes to sit nice and obediently on the end of the bed. ]

She went with someone else. We had the Earth, but there wasn't anything resembling civilization for 145000 years.

[ Sad robot smile. ]

I saw her sometimes, in the faces of strangers.

[kickem]

Yeah. Women got a way of breaking hearts, huh?

[At least Ray didn't kidnap his lady for months on end.

He pauses, looks down almost awkwardly and then decides;]

I should go take a shower. Uh. If you wanna grab a coffee or something you can. Just don't touch anythin' else.

[hairlocked]

[ Only because he didn't think of it!

Leoben brightens slightly, and nods up at Ray, because as weird as it is, it's almost as though he'd being treated as a human being, and he appreciates that no small amount. Not just a crazy person or a Cylon, and to be honest it's been one, the other or both since his conception. ]

I won't touch anything else.

[kickem]

Good.

[Crazy person he may be, but Ray's still not entirely buying the robot story anyway.

Shower time! Off he goes to the bathroom to freshen up, dragging his gun along with him and locking the door, because no he's not leaving his loaded gun laying around near the crazy guy, no matter how harmless he may seem.

It's only five minutes later that he's out again, padding back to his bedroom in his underwear and rummaging for clean clothing.]

[hairlocked]

[ Leoben makes himself at home again, swanning around the apartment, making two cups of coffee, going through all of Ray's kitchen drawers not for the first time. He comes back to the kitchen with both cups, sipping from his own and holding the other one in his free hand as Ray reemerges from the bathroom, hair still damp. ]

Coffee? I made it the way you like.

[ Creepy stalker Cylon is creepy. ]

[kickem]

[This guy is weird. Too weird. Weirder than Fraser which is really fucking weird.]

Uh.

[Peers at the coffee, takes the coffee, sniffs the coffee.]

How d'you know how I like it?

[I looks pretty spot on to how he likes it. Tastes like it too as Ray takes a tentative sip. Hopefully it's not poisoned.]

[hairlocked]

I listen.

[ He tilts his head, watching as Ray hesitantly sips the coffee, and returns to drinking his own, at least for a few seconds.

Then he says: ]

Of course, I might have poisoned it. That's what you're thinking. You're a police officer, it's your job to be suspicious.

[kickem]

[That word, poison, is enough to have Ray halting any further sipping. Even if he had been thinking it, Leo mentioning it makes it sound all the more suspicious.]

Yeah. And all you gotta do is poison me, get rid of the body and uh, take over my life or whatever. Your plan kinda sucks though, cause my life isn't so fun to take over.